How to run a GraveTalk event

GRAVETALK HELPS TO OPEN UP deeper conversations with people in your community who may not otherwise have that opportunity. Here’s some background to these events, along with signposts to resources for running one locally.

Background

It has always been difficult to have conversations around death, dying and funerals, even more so when it gets personal.

However, in the past few years signs have been appearing that this taboo is under challenge, including the emergence of Death Festivals (Southbank), and the success of the grass-roots movement known as Death Café.

A Death Café is a space where people can eat cake and talk about death, sometimes in a real café or sometimes in a home or other meeting place. Young adults as well as older people find that once they start talking, there is a lot to be said about this sensitive but important reality.

The Church of England is well placed to be part of this momentum. We are there for people as they face death and there for them as they plan funerals and grieve. We also have plenty of space and are good at tea and cake.

What is GraveTalk?

GraveTalk is the Church of England’s café space to talk about death, dying and funerals.

It is organised by the local church and can be held in a hall, a home or a real cafe. At each event, a pack of GraveTalk questions are distributed – there are 50 specially written open questions which get people talking about death, dying, funerals and loss.

There are no answers, just conversation. And it’s open to people of all faiths and doubts.

The GraveTalk concept and resources has been carefully tested with parishes in partnership with the University of Staffordshire.

What you’ll need to run an event

• Volunteers to facilitate it and to help with making/serving tea and cake.
• A hall, cafe or other space where light refreshments can be served and where a few tables and chairs can be placed for people to sit around – it is up to you how many you can/would like to accommodate.
• A GraveTalk Facilitators’ Pack, available from Church House publishing, which explains all you’ll need to know.
• Gravetalk Conversation Cards, also available from Church House Publishing.
• You might also like to offer this Funeral Planning Booklet for people to take away. It’s specially designed to help people think about their own funeral ahead of time.
• You might like to publicise the events with a poster and invitations.

FAQs

Does it have to be run by a vicar?
No. GraveTalk can easily be led by a small team of lay people

Is it a sort of Lent course?
No. GraveTalk is not a course, it is a conversation. Some people will only come once, others might come for a second or third time.

How do we publicise it?
Share details on your church’s social media account, and in local community social media accounts. If you have the resources, put a few posters up around your community advertising the date and time. The local press may also be interested.

What age group is it for?
It is suitable for anyone. Young people have really become involved in these conversations, as well as an older generation.